Election….candidate?

On May 2nd Canadians rush to the polls to vote in our Federal Election.

Yippee.

The coverage of this election has been exhausting but necessary and the candidates have sunk to their usual lows in order to gain majority.

Because I’m obviously a dedicated member of my community and because I take an interest in my country’s future I’ve decided that I should run for parliament.

Or be the next Prime Minister.

But Leighann…. You know nothing about politics!

Don’t be a negative Nancy!

Neither do the politicians!

Here’s the super exciting changes I’m working on:

1. Ensure every staff member at Tim Horton’s understands the importance of A. making a cup of coffee the way it was ordered and B. putting napkins in the bag.

2. Increase policing on our major highway, the 401, for the specific purpose of guaranteeing slow drivers KEEP RIGHT. (if you have trouble understanding this it’s because you’re a slow driver and you need to keep right).

3. Allow Canadians to double up on coupons! Have you seen that show Extreme Couponing? We can’t do that here.. annoying!

4. No more Taylor Swift songs played in Canada.

5. Fine Walmart $50,000 every time they are out of a product shown in their flyer. $100,000 if it is diapers.

6. Make it illegal to A. scream into your cell phone while you are standing RIGHT beside me.. Seriously! What are you doing? Why are you yelling? Have you ever owned a cell phone? Is this the first time you’ve ever used it..right now? Inside my eardrum?
B. use a cell phone while talking to me in person. I can use one while talking to you though. I know… so rude.

7. Lower gas prices to 4 cents/L and make it all full serve.

8. Oh and I’d just get rid of the deficit, funding problems, and tax issues by PRINTING MORE MONEY!! Helloooo… cause I’d be the boss.

I’ll begin getting my campaign team ready for the next election.

All of these issues are sure to be around still.

Ahem.

Leighann

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10 Responses to Election….candidate?
  1. Ironic Mom
    April 22, 2011 | 8:34 pm

    Hilarious. Good luck with those.

    • multitaskingmumma
      April 22, 2011 | 8:47 pm

      I’ll be calling you when I need a sponsor and a lawn for a sign!

  2. Jessica
    April 22, 2011 | 8:49 pm

    So funny, but um, I actually like Taylor Swift.

  3. Nic
    April 23, 2011 | 12:37 am

    I’m totally part of your team right ?
    I agree with everything but #4. I like her!!!!!

  4. Leigh Ann (The Twin Spin)
    April 23, 2011 | 6:52 am

    Genius! You forgot to mention all the Targets you’d open. I’d totally cross the border and fake being Canadian so I could vote for you. You’d be a shoo in with all that money you’d be printing.

  5. Andrea
    April 23, 2011 | 6:40 pm

    I love it. Can you come talk to some of the American politicians while you’re at it? But I will say I like Taylor Swift, too. Oops.

  6. Carri
    April 24, 2011 | 1:08 pm

    Printing more money = inflation. That’s no bueno.

    However, I can totally stand behind punching people who drive slow in the fast lane.

  7. Carina
    April 25, 2011 | 5:18 am

    Good luck with that platform. 🙂 Sometimes I wish I were Canadian….

  8. JDB
    April 25, 2011 | 7:16 am

    Well I will vote for you if you can make all of this happen:)

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Election….candidate?

On May 2nd Canadians rush to the polls to vote in our Federal Election.

Yippee.

The coverage of this election has been exhausting but necessary and the candidates have sunk to their usual lows in order to gain majority.

Because I’m obviously a dedicated member of my community and because I take an interest in my country’s future I’ve decided that I should run for parliament.

Or be the next Prime Minister.

But Leighann…. You know nothing about politics!

Don’t be a negative Nancy!

Neither do the politicians!

Here’s the super exciting changes I’m working on:

1. Ensure every staff member at Tim Horton’s understands the importance of A. making a cup of coffee the way it was ordered and B. putting napkins in the bag.

2. Increase policing on our major highway, the 401, for the specific purpose of guaranteeing slow drivers KEEP RIGHT. (if you have trouble understanding this it’s because you’re a slow driver and you need to keep right).

3. Allow Canadians to double up on coupons! Have you seen that show Extreme Couponing? We can’t do that here.. annoying!

4. No more Taylor Swift songs played in Canada.

5. Fine Walmart $50,000 every time they are out of a product shown in their flyer. $100,000 if it is diapers.

6. Make it illegal to A. scream into your cell phone while you are standing RIGHT beside me.. Seriously! What are you doing? Why are you yelling? Have you ever owned a cell phone? Is this the first time you’ve ever used it..right now? Inside my eardrum?
B. use a cell phone while talking to me in person. I can use one while talking to you though. I know… so rude.

7. Lower gas prices to 4 cents/L and make it all full serve.

8. Oh and I’d just get rid of the deficit, funding problems, and tax issues by PRINTING MORE MONEY!! Helloooo… cause I’d be the boss.

I’ll begin getting my campaign team ready for the next election.

All of these issues are sure to be around still.

Ahem.

Leighann

Thank you for SharingTweet about this on TwitterShare on StumbleUponShare on LinkedInShare on Google+Share on FacebookEmail this to someonePin on PinterestShare on Tumblr

Related Posts:

10 Responses to Election….candidate?
  1. Ironic Mom
    April 22, 2011 | 8:34 pm

    Hilarious. Good luck with those.

    • multitaskingmumma
      April 22, 2011 | 8:47 pm

      I’ll be calling you when I need a sponsor and a lawn for a sign!

  2. Jessica
    April 22, 2011 | 8:49 pm

    So funny, but um, I actually like Taylor Swift.

  3. Nic
    April 23, 2011 | 12:37 am

    I’m totally part of your team right ?
    I agree with everything but #4. I like her!!!!!

  4. Leigh Ann (The Twin Spin)
    April 23, 2011 | 6:52 am

    Genius! You forgot to mention all the Targets you’d open. I’d totally cross the border and fake being Canadian so I could vote for you. You’d be a shoo in with all that money you’d be printing.

  5. Andrea
    April 23, 2011 | 6:40 pm

    I love it. Can you come talk to some of the American politicians while you’re at it? But I will say I like Taylor Swift, too. Oops.

  6. Carri
    April 24, 2011 | 1:08 pm

    Printing more money = inflation. That’s no bueno.

    However, I can totally stand behind punching people who drive slow in the fast lane.

  7. Carina
    April 25, 2011 | 5:18 am

    Good luck with that platform. 🙂 Sometimes I wish I were Canadian….

  8. JDB
    April 25, 2011 | 7:16 am

    Well I will vote for you if you can make all of this happen:)

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