Today I’m linking up with The TRUTH About Motherhood for Throat Punch Thursday.
Twice in two weeks my body has been touched without my permission. (and so not in a way I would love to be writing about…ahem)
Twice I have been patted in such a way that it not only embarrasses me but it makes the tapper feel awkward and ashamed.
As they should.
This uninvited touching has forced me to make a formal public service announcement:
I am NOT pregnant.
Do not touch my belly, rub my belly, assist me by offering me a chair, or ask me how I’m feeling.
I feel fine.
You, however, are about to be red faced, head down, foot in mouth humiliated!
I had a baby 13 months ago!
I carry weight in my STOMACH!
I lose fat first in my legs, face, and chest. THAT is why my stomach looks like I have a child growing in there.
Weren’t you ever taught to never EVER mention a pregnancy unless you
A. Hear the woman talking about it first and rubbing her belly
B. Are at her baby shower
C. SEE THE BABY COMING OUT
For you people who have knocked your heads too many times I am giving you a massive ninja THROAT PUNCH!