Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

I can appreciate that you are generally a man saved for children’s wishes during the holiday season, and I’m certainly not one to shove toddlers out of the way in order to get to you first.


I see the delight in the children’s eyes on Christmas morning when they discover that you have arrived and you knew exactly what they wanted.

And each Christmas the butterflies in my stomach flutter with excitement as I search eagerly for the gift I hope you have left.

For the first few Christmases I thought you would just know what I wanted, like you do with the children around the world. You would look on your naughty and nice list and see how well behaved I have been and approve my mortgage payment. You would send a check off and write me a sweet letter, sealing it with a candy kiss and place it on my tree.

You must have forgotten?

For the next couple of years I wrote you letters, but other than a letter back in the mail, I received nothing.

No diamonds, no new vehicle, no winning lottery ticket, and I did not find a maid in my stocking.

Did I write to the wrong Santa?

This year I am flying directly to the North Pole, no need to convince me otherwise Santa. I know you are busy and this is why I am coming. I am a multitasker, so I am coming to assist you with granting all of the adults’ wishes. And let’s be honest, many of them need a Christmas miracle more than the children.


Okay fine, I’m coming because if I don’t get my daycare bill paid I’m gonna lose my shit!


Leighann xo


Mama’s Losin’ It

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32 Responses to Dear Santa
  1. Alison@Mama Wants This
    December 8, 2011 | 7:40 am

    Hahaha! Watch out Santa!

  2. Leigh Ann
    December 8, 2011 | 10:50 am

    Santa has failed to bring me a new Lexus with a huge bow on top, like all the people on the commercials get. What the heck, Santa?

    On the other hand, at least Santa wouldn’t buy my gifts with my own Amazon account, ensuring that I get the emails telling me what my gift is. Surely he has his own.

  3. Stephanie @ Our Marriage Adventure
    December 8, 2011 | 10:54 am

    LOL Can I give you a copy of my letter to drop off too?

    ~Visiting from MamaKAt

  4. Dana K
    December 8, 2011 | 11:12 am

    BAHAHAHAHAHAHA damn…Santa better watch his back. I’m hoping he visits me this year, too.

  5. Arnebya
    December 8, 2011 | 1:15 pm

    I don’t think Santa even knows I exist.

  6. imperfectmomma
    December 8, 2011 | 1:18 pm


  7. katery
    December 8, 2011 | 3:28 pm

    lol, good luck!

  8. Amber
    December 8, 2011 | 4:10 pm

    What airlines do you take to get to the Northpole?

  9. Cathy
    December 8, 2011 | 6:17 pm

    You don’t know what Santa has in store for you this year. Patience darling. And please pay the daycare bill. We don’t want them to reposess Peanut.

  10. Sweaty
    December 8, 2011 | 6:19 pm

    That’s the way to go, girlfriend! Straight to North Pole, knock on that door, and just do it yourself!! I always think Santa would be much more efficient if he were a girl! lol

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 10:03 pm

      You wanna come?
      That’s me being gangsta!

  11. Kindred Adventures
    December 8, 2011 | 6:56 pm

    LOVED the letter! You had me laughing out loud. I think deep down inside we adults feel the same way… Secretly hoping for that magic Santa gift under the tree. Let me know how going right up there and meeting the guy works out for you! -Laverne

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:49 pm

      There is no shame in picking the tree up and shaking it just to be sure there’s nothing left in there for you.

    December 8, 2011 | 11:54 pm

    DUDE, your stocking must be ENORMOUS!!!

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:48 pm

      are you hitting on me?


  13. Lady Estrogen
    December 9, 2011 | 12:08 am

    NO DIAMONDS? NO VEHICLE? Pshh-shhaa!
    It’s an eff’ed up system, I’m sure of it 🙂

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:48 pm

      Dude! If I don’t get a mutha heffin envelope full of cash this year I’m settin’ the roof on fiya!

  14. Kimberly
    December 9, 2011 | 1:28 am

    Hahaha! I hope he listens to me this year too.

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:45 pm

      If not then we’ll tag team the bastard!

  15. Jessica
    December 9, 2011 | 2:23 am

    I do believe that adults get screwed when Santa makes his list. I hope you straighten this out.

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:45 pm

      I’m gonna get all up in his grill!

  16. Julie
    December 9, 2011 | 1:44 pm

    Here’s the thing. I think it’s because we’ve admitted to ourselves and others that…he’s not real.

    Now, my sister? My almost 30-year-old sister? Has NEVER publicly decried his existence. So she still gets Santa presents. I think she’s smarter than me.

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:28 pm


  17. Galit Breen
    December 9, 2011 | 11:03 pm


    {I might have to out you though -not so scary- more of a love, actually!}


  18. Ali
    December 10, 2011 | 11:32 am

    You’re funny!

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:21 pm


      not as funny as you beotch!

  19. Paulette (MsPDrama)
    December 11, 2011 | 12:08 pm

    Santa better watch his back. LOL!

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:15 pm

      I gotta take someone down for all of this daycare debt!

  20. Miss Marina Star
    December 12, 2011 | 9:39 pm

    I will be honest, Santa has tried, but I seem to end up paying for every extravagant gift I receive! It just doesn’t seem to be worth it.

    • multitaskingmumma
      December 12, 2011 | 9:43 pm

      I will kick Santa’s ass.

  21. […] want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!With all of the stalking letters I have been writing to Santa, and last-minute trips to peek in his windows speak to him about adjustments in his obviously […]

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