When I started this blog it was to connect with other mothers who were struggling with postpartum, then as my blog developed, it was to create awareness about mental health.
As I struggled with bipolar and my diagnosis I relied heavily on this space to write out my thoughts, discuss my feelings, and looked for support. I found a community of people who understood and cared what I was going through and held there hands out to pull me from the my darkness.
But as I settle in to a med cocktail that agrees with me, find happiness I haven’t had in a long time with my family, my friends, the outdoors, and myself, and feel comfortable even when I have difficult days and deal with secondary infertility, I find it harder and harder to dedicate time to this space.
I want to continue to advocate for mental health awareness, postpartum education, and share my experience but I also want to live in the now, in my happiness.
Sharing stories from my darkness is triggering and I’m afraid to go back there.
So that’s where I’m at, happy.
But struggling with writing that way.
I have always written from my darkness and now I am trying to connect with who I am in the light.
I’m at a crossroads.
Finding my new path, rediscovering a brighter me with my words in this space.
Or leaving behind my blog.