I Don’t Know if This is Even a Post

So used to buying the tiny “panties” that never fit properly, slide down my ass, and creep into my butt I cautiously looked at the underwear made for my size at the store I was in and balked.

HA! I don’t need to buy new underwear, the size I’m wearing is fine.

And then I hiked them back up from under my butt cheeks for good measure.

Behind a rack, where no one could see me, because it’s hard to get your underwear out from under your butt and not pull your pants right down.

I scanned the rows and rows of pretty underwear, noticing a few patterns I liked, and reminding myself that I had no underwear that stayed up. BUT I didn’t want to fall prey to the BIG underwear dilemma. You know, when you pull out the laundry and you actually fold your underwear five times because it’s gotten so big….

Or is that just my fear?

Has this post gotten away from me?

The point is I spend half of my day chasing my underwear down the leg of my pants and the other half chasing it up my rear.

I needed a change.

So I did it.

I bought the new unders. I went a size up instead of wishing on a star that my ass would get smaller and I would fit into my shrunken (yes they did shrink in the wash mmmmk) underwear again.

And I feel AAAAMAZING!

No more sneaking around corners to find the wayward gitch. No more excusing myself to the bathroom to yank up my drawers. No more taking them off and throwing them in my purse….

Wait.

What?

No… I didn’t do that.

Okay, once.

And they didn’t fall out when I went to pay for something because that’s gross and I don’t approve of that type of behaviour.

Perverts.

If this post should teach you anything it should teach you to branch out and throw out your damn underwear if it’s creepin’.

Or showing – hello T-Bars! Thongs comin’ out the back! No one wants to see that!

I’m here to help you better yourself.

Now go… there’s a sale!

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4 Responses to I Don’t Know if This is Even a Post
  1. Jordan
    February 9, 2015 | 11:20 am

    Love it!!

  2. Kimberlly
    February 10, 2015 | 2:23 pm

    Oh. My. Butt floss….

  3. Lyla Jackson
    February 12, 2015 | 2:05 pm

    I don’t usually give diet advice but I’ve found that the best cure for a butt that’s too big for petite looking underwear, is a thong! 🙂

    • multitaskingmumma
      February 16, 2015 | 9:10 am

      Love this advice lol

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