I have been submitting to a lot of places lately in order to have my writing read from different venues and while some have been very welcoming with great feedback, others have told me I’m not a good “fit” for what they are looking for. My words don’t flow with what they are currently presenting. Try a “list” or a “comparison” post. Try humour or backyard stories.
The stories I tell aren’t cookie cutter. They don’t come in the form of a list (very often) or a comparison. My stories come from a place that isn’t talked about very often, it’s hidden away behind closed doors, hushed at the water cooler, and laughed at by people who have no concept of what it feels like to live with a mental illness.
My words come from a place that some people find uncomfortable and many don’t want to see. It isn’t butterflies and rainbows, unicorns and glitter. I don’t blow wishes and dreams up your butt and I don’t sugar coat the way that I’m feeling. Things get real here.
And the way I feel?
It’s a reality for many, many more people than you could ever know.
But we are keeping these stories hidden, instead opting for lists about how many different ways your can clean your kitchen with a child on your hip, or who did the latest mommy war parody.
The internet is inundated with attacks on women by other women, wars on parenting, and posts based on everything we do wrong as humans.
I want to be a voice for those people who aren’t looking for the next craze, war, or debate.
I’m the voice for the mother who just got home from the hospital and is weeping into the silence because she’s scared of the thoughts she’s having and isn’t sure what’s wrong. I write for the people who are swallowed in darkness and are sure there will never be light again. I keep posting for those who have been to hell and know they have to keep fighting every day in order to keep the clouds away.
My words are for those who need support, a connection, or someone who understands exactly where they are this very moment.
Because I’ve been there.
Let these words out, let’s make the stories of triumph, darkness, awareness, and real feelings be the ones that make the pages we scroll through.
Lets build each other up instead of tearing each other down.