The Sun will Rise Without my Salute

Awhile ago I joined the gym. 

Then, due to high momentum, motivation, and the high possibility of being drunk I went to a yoga class with a friend at her gym. 

My friend, Jordan, is kick ass when it comes to working out. 

She was my inspiration for starting. 

And when I walked into the gym and told them who I was there to meet they knew her by name.

By. Name. 

I waddled my way to the yoga class to wait for my friend and immediately began to panic. 

I wasn’t wearing running shoes. 

Everyone else was. 

Was I supposed to? 

I thought yoga was a barefoot thing. 

Maybe I was wrong. Maybe it had changed because of bad foot odor or fungus?

It didn’t matter. 

I was the only person wearing a fashionable shoe. 

Kill me. 

I did some deep breathing, looked around the gym, checked my phone…

OH GAWD, were we allowed on our phones?

Jordan quickly joined me and we quietly entered the yoga room and picked a mat, blanket, and styrofoam block. 

The cutest little instructor informed us not to worry if we were new, as she stared directly at me, we would be doing deep breathing and stress relief as our focus. 


Because that’s what I needed. 

People started to take their shoes and socks off and my anxiety began to melt away. 

I rested in a nice “criss-cross applesauce” position waiting for her to tell us to lay down, expecting some soft leg lifts, maybe a few arm reaches, and an ommmm but she hoped right up and asked us to salute the sun. 

News flash, lady!

It’s 7:00 pm. The sun is asleep and I’m ready to lay down and listen to whales singing and waves crashing as I drift off into an hours nap.

Jordan, bless her heart, looked at me lovingly, knowing the motions we were going through were not meant for my robust figure and she slow blinked in my direction. 

A silent prayer. 

These were positions that I had never attempted in my life, not even before I had gained extra weight and I quickly discovered I had zero flexibility. 

I missed 15 minutes of the class when my boobs choked me and I blacked out. 

Everyone was in a “relaxed” hold and didn’t seem to notice my lifelessness. 

As we finished up and everyone laid flat on their mats, covered up for warmth with their blankets, I used mine for a pillow and reached out for my friend’s hand. 

Inappropriate tomfoolery. 

Just like laughing at church. 

Not supposed to do it. 

So when it happens it’s ten times as funny. 

That is the best part. 

As for yoga. 


No more. 

The sun will rise without my salute. 

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4 Responses to The Sun will Rise Without my Salute
  1. Jordan
    August 11, 2016 | 8:58 am

    You sure know how to make us laugh with your words. I loved reliving this moment we shared through your words. Ha! I live in a small town its not because I’m Rambo of the gym. lol. The silent laughter that turns to tears because you shouldn’t be laughing is my FAVORITE kind of laughter. Thank you for sharing that moment with me:) xoxo

    • multitaskingmumma
      August 15, 2016 | 12:16 pm

      you will always be one of my favourite people to giggle with

  2. Charity
    August 19, 2016 | 2:15 pm

    Thanks for the laugh…glad Kim sent me your way 🙂

    • multitaskingmumma
      August 23, 2016 | 8:23 am

      Thanks, Charity!! I love seeing you here!

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