Tag Archive: depression

The Worst Day Ever

We rode our bikes furiously down the sidewalk. We were 12 so the safest place for us was there, where pedestrians walked. Pedestrian safety wasn’t on our minds as we raced each other through the narrow spaces, around signs, through people, and over blocks of cement, we were young and we had the wind in our hair….

On a Scale of 1 -10

  Her office was stifling, small, and reminded me of the 1970’s. The chairs were placed directly across from her desk which held a single computer and several files, one of which was mine. She had combed over it, she said, before I had arrived. She was my replacement doctor while my own doctor was…

Grateful for YOU

It’s quiet in the house, there’s only the sound of the fridge running in the back ground and the train in the distance. I’ve had a lot of time to reflect, to express my thoughts, and to rest. I needed to. And I’m feeling grateful. I’m overwhelmed with gratitude towards my family and friends who…

Through the Kaleidoscope

She snuggles in close and throws her hand up into my hair, a habit she’s had since infancy. Her purple princess dress spreads out across my lap while the sounds of cartoons fill my ears. I sip my coffee and scratch endlessly at the hives that have appeared all over my body since the medication…

Here in the Dark

The familiar smell of the building hit me in the face as I walked through the doors. I made note of it, remembering the last time I’d been a patient. Over a year ago. I had been discharged because I was stable and we had found the right dosage. The right cocktail. I was finding…

Let the Shattered Pieces Fall

Just when I thought the feelings had dissipated and I might be on the mend a flash of a baby’s hand and a sweet foot came across my computer screen and I was swept away, back to December when my heart was torn from my chest and I was left disappointed, heartbroken, and lost for the second time….

Remember This…This is You

What’s that under your frown? A smile that used to light up a room. A laugh that used to be contagious. Tell me a story about the time you had the most fun. Don’t leave out the good stuff. I want to see your frown fade and the spark you have inside come alive. I…

Just Fake Smile

She wrapped her arms around me and held on longer than I would expect a co-worker to; her face a mixture of “I’m sorry,” and “I don’t know what to say so maybe I’ll hug you again.” Just as predicted her arms reached out for me again. I could feel the tears welling up in my…

It’s Not Time Yet

There’s a gray veil that covers the landscape and the skies are dark. That’s how it looks. Even though the sun is shining. I burrow deeper under the blanket and curl up tighter on the far end of the couch. I feel guilty for taking up this space, for not feeling like moving, for my continued sadness….