Tag Archive: PPD

I am not my Mental Illness

With Bipolar, or any mental illness, comes a stigma that in order to be creative we have to be full of angst. We have to be manic or severely depressed in order to create our best work. I know because I feel it. I feel the pressure to deliver my best writing but look back…

The Face of PPD

There was a quiet in the room, one that deafened me each time I rocked her. I would shake my leg out of anxiety, rock back and forth, and pray for sleep to come so that I could place her down and walk away. Motherhood did not come easily. She was safe in her crib,…

The Author is You

I’m in a good place right now. I had a lot of support and encouragement when I was at my worst. But, I will never forget the pain of PPD and Bipolar, the confusion brought on by suicidal ideation, the release you feel when you make a plan, the sadness and loneliness of depression, or…

Why It IS Okay to Share Online

Recently I have seen several posts on social media questioning parents and their ease with sharing their children’s pictures and stories. They suggest that we are too free with their lives and perhaps our children will grow up resenting us. Resenting the potty photo? What?! The whole thing is baffling me. I share my daughter’s…

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181 Days

6 months ago I laid in a hospital bed while a dr. told me I’d lost the baby I’d been so happy to be growing. All I could think was I’d lost it because I was such a terrible mother for the first two years of my daughter’s life and I didn’t deserve another shot….

Celebrating Milestones: Win a Printable Party Pack from Magic Imprints

My daughter turned three on the weekend. I am overjoyed. This is a big deal for me because when I was in the throws of Postpartum every birthday; every milestone, felt like an ending. I dreaded her first steps, prayed she stay a baby longer instead of saying her first word, and cried when she…

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Great Expectations

What on EARTH would make someone want another baby? I was baffled and could feel tears stinging my eyes for the second time that day, there was NO WAY I was ever doing this again! I looked at my husband and told him with purpose “NO MORE BABIES!” He looked down, took my hand, and…

Just Hold My Hand

“Do you want me to lay with you?” Even in the dark I could see her stubborn blond hair gathered in wisps around her face and her little girl body curled into a warm grey blanket snuggled tightly beside her favourite stuffed animal. “No, just hold my hand.” I reached for her hand and held…

Sugar, Holidays, and Puppies Crying

I’ve finished my holidays. I feel like one hundred puppies are crying inside my soul. For two weeks we slept in, hung out in our pajamas, built towers, watched movies, put together puzzles, played in the snow, ate candy too early in the morning, and enjoyed each other. It has taken a long time for…