Looking out at the snow covered trees that haven’t given us reprieve from winter for months, I snuggle deeper into the soft blankets on my bed and breathe in the sage I left burning on my bench.
Positive energy surrounds me and I can hear the sounds of laughter from my daughter in the living room.
Her laughter muffled only by her breaks to shove cookies into her mouth.
This was not always my life.
I fought hard to get to this place of self love, acceptance, and confidence.
It wasn’t easy to continually spiral out of control, accept my mental illness, and ride a roller coaster of uncontrolled emotion for 7 years.
Looking back, reading back; closing my eyes and feeling the pain that once was my life, I acknowledge how far I have come.
I clawed my way out of a very dark place. One filled with doubts, sadness, and frustration.
I did it with support, love, and education. I did it with friends, and family, and love.
No one gave up on me.
But I chuckle…
I laugh a little because I know that bipolar is unpredictable. Just like the weather, no one can truly predict when the storm will come.
No one knows if the snow will be a light dusting, with a few little crystals glimmering on top of the grass, or if it will be a storm, causing black outs, car crashes, and injury to all parties who have come in contact.
I have learned to appreciate the moments of beautiful weather and bask in the light of self care.
And for today am grateful.